The AP article began by quoting the report's assertion that "Weather catastrophes around the world show there is little doubt the Earth's climate is changing, the outgoing head of the UN Framework Convention on Climate Change warned yesterday." Little doubt? Well, only if the reporter slept through every science class he ever took.

"The Earth is facing a 'worrisome situation, with catastrophes occurring daily, causing enormous damage and making climate change an undeniable reality,' said Mohamed Elyazghi of Morocco, the outgoing president of the UN convention. The UN conference, we were told, was "aimed at reducing greenhouse gas emissions and curbing global warming."

When it comes to "catastrophes", Mother Nature's enduring message to mankind is "Get out of the way! Here comes a blizzard, a hurricane, a flood, a tornado, a volcano erupting, an earthquake, a mudslide, an avalanche, or a huge forest fire. These are only catastrophes when they affect the lives of humans. Otherwise, they are just Mother Nature doing what she has been doing for 4.5 billion years. In the process, she has also managed to insure that ninety percent of all species that ever lived on Earth have gone extinct.

Here is Weather 101. The weather is the purest definition of chaos there is in the world. The most expensive, sophisticated weather prediction computer models are unable to predict any weather condition more than about 24 to 48 hours in advance and half the time they get it wrong.

The Earth has not "warmed" in more than a half-century since the 1950s, and meteorol- ogical satellites have consistently found a slight cooling, as have other devices, such as radiosonde balloons. In short, there is NO global warming. At least, not one that will leave the Earth a barren desert in the next few decades or centuries.

That said, the Earth has been warming since the last Ice Age ended around 10,000 to 25,000 years ago, and you can thank that warming for the emergence of the human race, Homo Sapiens. As the warming occurred, members of the human species started walking and spread all over the world. These humans developed agriculture and, about five thousand years ago, they began to create what we call civilization.

The United Nations' bogus global warming campaign, however, is not about "controlling" the weather. That is impossible. Thus, the Kyoto "Climate Control" Protocol is a classic oxymoron.

The purpose of the press conference was to advance the devious aims of the 1997 Kyoto Protocol. Among its miscreant purposes is to destroy the economies of Western, indus- trialized nations while transferring its money and technologies to Third World nations. Among the nations that would be exempt from the Protocol would be Red China and India, both of whom account for a huge chunk of humanity. The nations that would benefit from the Protocol, generally speaking, are the same ones that ignore things like feeding their people, building roads, insuring clean water, and generating enough electricity to bring them out of the Stone Age.

A UN report released in early October by its Climate Change Working Group actually admits that the Kyoto treaty won't do anything to affect the planet's climate, and then demands more of the same. The current Protocol would cost, conservatively, about two percent of our Gross Domestic Product, and more of the same would be irrational. Suf- fice it to say, the UN report is a load of stinking, steaming inaccuracies.

The problem of refuting global warming claims persists, however, because of (1) the United Nations unrelenting lies about it and (2) the failure of the world's news media to once, just once, say it ain't so.

Alan Caruba is a veteran business and science writer, a Public Relations Counselor, and Founder of the National Anxiety Center. Caruba writes a weekly column, "Warn- ing Signs," posted on www.anxietycenter.com, the Internet website maintained by the National Anxiety Center. In January, 2003, Merrill Press will publish a collection of Caruba's writings.

The National Anxiety Center is located at 9 Brookside Road, Maplewood, New Jersey, 07040.

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